Hey Bestie! Let’s talk about how to come back to God when you feel too ashamed to try.
Shame can create real distance between you and God. This type of distance isn’t where you stop believing in God either.
It’s more of a feeling that you’re unworthy to even show up to be with Him. What’s interesting is that you can know that God loves you and still experience this.
You can even know what His word says, but your mind still goes back to all your mistakes. Then you start to think that you have to get better before going back to Him.
You even tell God how you’re going to do better this time and that you’ll try harder to live for Him.
Bestie, this isn’t how God wants us to think.
You were never supposed to think that you had to clean yourself up because you’re HIS kid. The only things you’re responsible for are showing up and following His lead.
Today we will be talking through what shame does to your relationship with God, the lies shame tells, and what coming back actually looks like.
This post will be all about how to come back to God when you feel too ashamed to try.
Are you ready? Let’s geaux!
What Shame Actually Does To Your Relationship With God
Before we talk about what shame does to your relationship with God, let’s talk through what shame is.
Shame is when you start to believe that you are your actions. In society, we typically label each other by our actions.
For example, if someone creates content, they’re labeled as a content creator. If someone commits a crime, they are labeled as a criminal.
But the reality is, your entire life isn’t defined by what you do in a moment or a time period in your life.
Shame is a form of condemnation. It places you and your mistakes as the focal point of your life.
It’s what the enemy uses to tell you thinks like:
- You’re too far gone.
- God is done with you.
- You’re not gonna be able to live His way.
- You can’t do anything right.
- You’ll never be who God called you to be.
- And more.
Reflection Questions: What are the lies that the enemy is using against you? Do you hear shame while reading this post?
Shame can make you feel like you don’t know what to do anymore. I know that I’ve prayed those exact words to God on several occasions. When you don’t know what to do, there is a way that God leads you that helps you to understand what really matters in this life. This devotional is for the woman who may be lost or starting over looking for guidance from God on what to do. If that is you, click the image below to get a copy of the devotional sent straight to your inbox.
The Lies Shame Tells You About Coming Back
Shame is a liar and it tends to tell every woman the same exact story.
If you’ve ever walked away from God, you’ve probably heard things like:
- It’s too late. You’ve missed your opportunity.
- You messed up too many times. God won’t give you more chances.
- God doesn’t want to hear about the same struggles over and over again so it makes no sense to pray about it.
- You should be further along by now.
- You’re not cut out for this life, how would God use you?
- Everybody else has it together and then there’s you.
- You’re the only one who struggles with this.
All of these are straight up lies! God, however, says something different.
He says:
- I chose you, you didn’t choose me (John 15:16).
- Come to me when you are weary (Matthew 11:28).
- I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go (Psalm 32:8).
- Return to me and I will return to you (Zechariah 1:3).
- Christ has cleansed you of all of your sins (1 John 1:7).
- I loved you when you were still far away (Romans 5:8).
Reflection Questions: What lie have you been believing? What truth can you replace it with?
How To Come Back To God (Even When Shame Is Loud)
Coming back to God isn’t complicated. There’s also no one size fits all way to come back either. These are a few tips to simplify things in your mind so you can return with ease.
1. Come As You Are
There has never been a time when God expected you to have it all together. I want you to let that sink in because maybe there was someone who had that expectation of you.
God isn’t looking for you to know what to do or say. He wants you to believe that He is enough to help you to be who He designed you to be originally.
Again the only thing you need to do is show up and follow His lead.
What does that look like practically?
- Reading the Word and practicing what it says to do.
- Hearing what God says in prayer and obeying His word.
- Applying what the pastor preaches on Sunday.
Even if you don’t have anything to say, you can just be there with Him. There will be times when you won’t know what to say. Allow Him to direct you.
*inserts ad for prayer prompts
2. Release It Unto God
Shame only sticks when it’s unspoken and hidden. The moment you confess it, you will feel a huge weight lifted off of your shoulders.
Write what happened down. Say it aloud.
Whatever you have to do to release it unto God and trust that He is with you.
It’s not about making God aware of what was done. It is about releasing it off of your own conscience so that it no longer puts a wedge between you and Him.
3. Separate Who You Are From What Was Done
Your identity was secure in Christ before the foundations of this world. You weren’t sent to this Earth to be someone; you were Born as someone.
So this means that your mistakes don’t define you. You are not your worst or best moments. Bestie, you are everything God says you are and you have to find it within yourself to believe that.
Your identity didn’t expire because of a few bumps in the road. Shame may want you to believe that, but God says otherwise.
Who is it that you’ll believe?
4. Start With One Small Step Towards Him
If you couldn’t swim and your instructor told you to jump into the deep end of the pool, you would look at her crazy.
It’s the same with coming back to God. You have to start small just as if you’re learning to swim.
This looks like:
- Meeting God in the same location every morning.
- Saying one prayer.
- Reading one verse or chapter.
- Listening to one sermon (even a short of one).
- Journaling to Him.
- Listening to one worship song.
Small steps are still steps. In this fast paced world, it may seem like nothing, but just like money, it all adds up.
Take a step towards God and watch Him honor it by meeting you with more than you expected.
What Coming Back To God Actually Looks Like
Coming back to God isn’t done in a single moment. It’s a daily decision to turn towards Him instead of away from Him.
Even when you don’t “feel” like it, go to Him. When you want to reach for Tiktok or Instagram, go to Him.
Some days you will feel His presence. Other days you won’t feel anything at all.
It’s not about a feeling, it’s about the relationship. Every moment between you and God matters.
He has been with you even when you didn’t notice Him. And He has vowed to never leave or forsake you.
Shame will not cause God to look at you as anything less than His daughter. God has never stopped loving you and He never will.
This post was all about how to come back to God when you feel too ashamed to try.
Before You Go…Let’s Recap
A quick recap of how to come back to God even when shame is loud:
- Come as you are.
- Release the shame unto God.
- Separate who you are from what was done.
- Start with one step towards Him.
If You Enjoyed This Post, You’ll Love These:
How To Start Again After Quitting On Yourself
Accepting God’s Forgiveness: 6 Keys For Your Personal Healing Journey
Forgiving Yourself: 5 Steps To Forgive Yourself God’s Way
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Always remember that you’re destined to win because He got up!
-Devyn Janae
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